At times, would you look back and reflect on your life? Are you contented with all that you have now? What changes would you have done if given the chance?

I know a few things in life I would like to change, or in my relationship, things that I like. Things that I don't. Things that I don't want in the future. But there's little I can do. Ways to change, I've tried. And sometimes it gets tiring, am I expecting too much? I wish things are simpler, that things would just resolve themselves. I just want to be carefree but its not easy.

Being so stubborn and hot headed myself, it is really tough being with someone twice as stubborn and twice as hot headed than I already am. And sometimes being extremely patient is not enough. It takes a lot to build a strong and lasting relationship. I think I've played my part well, I have given as much as I could, accept as little than I should and try to be as understanding as possible.

But I ain't so superwoman, I ain't perfect.

Thus this post serves as a reminder to myself. To tell myself that I've tried. I've tried communicating, I've tried reasoning and I've tried telling you as directly as possible what I wanted. Because it is important to me, because it means a great deal to me, because it is something I want for the rest of my life. So please don't blame me if ever this becomes the reason we part. Please understand that I'm not being ridiculous, please know that I don't want to be miserable and crazy everyday in our lives.

I need this, and if you aren't giving it to me, I shall move on and search somewhere else.